Peculiar

Minister: I now pronounce you man and wife.

New Husband: Well, you're going to have some awkward conversations in the future.

New Wife: Thank God for pre-nups!

Readers of this blog: wha?

Kind of funny

I just received an email from the National Eagle Scout Association. Unfortunately, in my inbox the sender is abbreviated to "National Eagle Scout Ass." Perhaps someone should tell them.

I'm not surprised, but...

Drivers suck. I'm also not surprised that New York, Massachusetts, and DC are among the worst. New Jersey made it too.

Oh boy! I get to leave DC to drive to Massachusets through New Jersey and New York for Memorial Day weekend.

Language laughs

Just a few little giggles from today, and a memory of a few weeks ago...

I received an email today, as a response to wishing someone a happy birthday and to enjoy the time off. It read "Thank you, I will defiantly enjoy some much needed rest." I'm sure the meaning was "definitely" but the mistake is strangely appropriate.

This reminded me of a few weeks ago, when I was preparing to send a very carefully worded email to a coworker named "Butch." Fortunately, I realized before hitting "send" that I'd spelled his name with an "i."

A quick swiftie, of my own creation: "You're giving me Whiplash," Tom said Snidely. I hope no one has beaten me to that one. I'm quite proud of it.

Finally, an observation: see what happens when you insert a Grand Pause between the syllables in "grandpas."

A True Challenge

As one beginning to write seriously, in hope of discovering whether my talent is useless, worthy of publication, or lucrative, I am engaged in constant discovery. My most recent breakthrough has been to identify one of the great mysteries of good writing. I have a good understanding of the rules and a head for when to bend or break them. My vocabulary is sufficient, and I possess the discipline to use unusual words only where they fit best. I am confident enough to push forward yet humble enough to seek constant improvement from within and without. Among my shortcomings, though, is the lack of an instinct for what is bold versus what is hackneyed.

The two are often distinguished by the finest of lines. The same turn of phrase may be hackneyed in one context yet bold in another. The context may be formality: The journalist can take fewer liberties than the novelist, who can take fewer than the poet. The context may also be genre. The same degree of liberties may exist from one to the next, but each has its own flavor of boldness. Inextricably linked to these contexts is another: audience. The difference between freshness and garbage is ultimately determined by perception and reception. If one's readers think it stinks, then it stinks. Finally (perhaps distressingly), recognition has become another gauge. A prolific author may come to define what is bold. A passage written by a literary giant may be received as bold. The same passage, were it written by a newcomer, might be considered trite. Perhaps established authors have earned that much leniency - I don't mean to imply that the quality of their work suffers. My theory regarding this is that editors become more reluctant to strike down dangerous phrases as authors gain prominence. No writer is perfect, and as fewer changes are recommended more "mistakes" make it to the public. Also contributing to this effect is the reluctance of readers to acept a new voice. Those with a name are more readily trusted to mold the language in the right ways. This is not a criticism, but an observation of an inevitible result of Western thought. Skepticism is prized, so credibility must be earned.

As a reader and as a writer, I have recently encountered perhaps two dozen passages that are either bold or hackneyed, but whose classification eludes me. This is a notable stumbling block, because ordinarily I find reading to be the cure for a difficulty with writing. My method thus far has been to simply include the questionable content, mark it for later editing, and move on. This will do for now, but eventually I must make the decisions. I have decided, though, that rather than allow frustration to settle I will view this with excitement. Understanding this challenge is a positive step in my writing, and I am optimistic that mastery of the situation will come.

Update on files situation

I'm proud of myself. I purchased a bargain machine from w00t, a refurb slightly better than what I'd have otherwise bough and for slightly cheaper. The real bargain was the $5 shipping. Rather than fix my old POS, I bought a case and turned my old hard drive into an external. I grabbed all the files I need, wiped it, and now I have an 80 GB dump drive! woohoo!

I have not yet purchased MS Office, however, so I'm still waiting to be able to use those files again. The part I was afraid would be complicated is done, and it wasn't. Soon I will have that list of 100 books, with the added ones I've read since and have been keeping track of with ink and paper.

In other news, after reading Stephen King's On Writing, I am more confident than ever that I will soon at least know whether I have any future in the field. I have purchased a copy of Writer's Market, which also has an excellent web version; and am in general more motivated and dedicated to finishing projects. Before, it was write for a while, get some promising passages thrown down, and maybe hashing out 1,000 words of first draft.

Here's hoping they don't combine this with "Google Bombs"

This seems like an extraordinarily bad idea to me. Really, who thought this one up?

Enemies fleeing from you? Use new Google Refugee to kill every last one of the bastards!
Need better data on how to hit 'em where it hurts? Google Earth now features new Google Target logos pinpointing each food and health supply tent.

Perhaps next will be Google Counterintelligence or Google Troop Movements?